The words contained in this here journal may not make much sense and they may not bear any relation to reality but one thing is for sure, they'll contain the word pasty.
Monday, September 01, 2003
Given that my journal has been sat here not doing anything for a fortnight, this entry and subsequent rubbish will most likely never be read by anyone but myself. Perhaps this is for the best.
Well this weekend was spent staying at Beck’s house and was full of pleasures. On the Friday me, Jono and Capps all made the pilgrimage down to smelly South Yorkshire in order to take part in a large gathering of strange people from the strangest place on earth, the web board. Collecting Gemma from the station was the first task of the day and enabled me to make a nice game of not stepping on the cracks in the pavement, shopping centre, bridge, travel information point, steps and platform. I won. :D
Well they say that you only get one chance to make a first impression and on this occasion I chose to make it under the influence of far too many carbohydrates. I was quite literally bouncing off the walls. What Gemma made of this I have no idea but hopefully I didn’t scare her too much. No doubt she felt reassured that everyone else in the group took my hyperactivity in their stride, they’ve all seen it a thousand times before.
Once we’d all grouped together our first port of call was Tesco’s (and isn’t that always the truth for any situation?). I proceeded to charge about the store picking up bits of ice and skidding along the polished floors. And riding the shopping trolley, naturally. I was so engaged in causing mayhem I didn’t notice when Liam and Wend first poked their heads into the drinks aisle to meet us but as soon as their presence had been acknowledged by my conscious brain an intense desire manifested itself. Within milliseconds I was charging down the through the endless shelves of Fosters, Famous Grouse and Stones bitter towards the object of my desire, gathering it up in my arms in a highly emotional state with plenty of yelping. It’d been two months since I’d seen Liam, two months too long. So I hugged him and I hugged him and I refused to let go!
Come to think of it I might be a slapper. No really, just look at this list of people I hugged this weekend (in alphabetical order):
Beck
Capps
Dave
Gemma
Jono
Liam
Wend
Come to think of it that makes me sound gay as well, especially when you consider the fact that I had Liam sit on my lap and then proceeded to share a two-man tent with two men. In order to quash any rumours I’d just like to state that whereas Liam and Jono look like they’ve got pubes on their chins *goes on to list, at length, the visual flaws of the men at the meet* the women present are three of the most attractive peeps in the history of the human race. I’m not prepared to commit and say they’re the best looking entities in the universe quite yet though because it’s still a possibility that alien women with six breasts really do exist :D
That last comment didn’t really help in my efforts not to sound like a slapper did it?
I won an arm wrestling tournament which was moderately good for the old self-respect and I didn’t eat any of Sparky’s cooking which is moderately good for the old digestive system (and probably central nervous system too). Also woke up with a cat on me which was a bit surreal. Right I’m hungry.
